My Closet is Like Noah's Ark: Two of Everything

How many vintage Brighton belts does somebody need? Two, apparently. Like they say in the infomercials, "But wait, there's more!"

It appears when I like something, I really, really like it. Two of the identical belt, two of the same shoes, two of the same boots... My closet is like Noah's Ark, and that's not even counting some of the tack dupes I've found in boxes.

How many mullen mouth Pelham bits does anyone need? Four seems to be the magic number. Fillis stirrup irons? Many, many pair. Granted, it's nice to have a pair ready for whatever saddle I happen to fancy or rehab, but still.

I suppose some of the fashion dupes were acquired because I always keep a "skinny" set and a "fat" set, as I call them. Let's say I really like a certain style of jeans, but my size might go four up or down, depending. Well, I'm prepared: I have a skinny size and a fat size, so I'm never without my favorite jeans.

No, I can't trust myself to stay a certain size.

I've been a skinny size for several years. Before that, a fatter size. Before that, a super skinny size.

Middle age is a killer. When you're young, you can eat salad for a few days and lose 10 pounds. After 55, you're starving a month, gnashing your teeth, and have to bathe in the sacrificial blood of virgins to lose 10 pounds. Even then, all it takes is one night of barbecue and birthday cake before you can't zip your pants for the drive home.

Do I need a size medium and a size large vintage Brighton belt? Probably yes. Do I need size 28 through 32 breeches? Obviously. Even so, some of this stuff has to go.

Commencing the Great Purge of 2018 in 3, 2, 1...

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